Acing College Courses, Failing Hygiene Practices

This is Abby. She smells better than I do right now.

   After a university term full of rigorous English courses, I am relieved to return to writing content that I can compose as I nap. I found it difficult to remain awake as I wrote research papers, so accustomed had I gotten to typing this blog as I slept.

  Thanks to an intensive grammar class, you may notice that my writing has become more robust, and now contains impressive components such as nominative absolutes. If you do spot such a golden grammatical nugget in my blog, please let me know. I could never figure out what a nominative absolute was, and would not recognize one if it slapped me in the face. I'm not even sure they are capable of slapping, but I did feel as if I had been in some sort of bar brawl after studying them for 14 weeks.

 
   The most exciting aspect of the end of my school term is the opportunity to finally shower and comb my hair. I simply did not have the time for such frivolity while all those nominative absolutes were waiting to be... nominated. Or whatever they were doing. My hair was beginning to resemble the fur of a cat who had just encountered a rabid moose. Unfortunately, I do not have a cat's advantage of tongue bathing. So, yesterday I gave it a thorough scrubbing. And that shampoo job will have to last for the next six weeks, because I start another term on Monday. 

   It's too bad, really. My husband had to work on the one day my hair was clean.